btw-my old bf that emailed me the other day..i emailed her back and she hasn’t returned my email…hmmm she’s probably not online or something-has to go to her parents to use the computer, perhaps. maybe i’ll meet someone tonight at j’s. right.. i never do.cute player boy is not going to be there…so i don’t…

mom is here. she is sitting in the lving room ‘quilting’. we stayed in last night and ordered chinois.then later we walked up to stircrazy and got peppermint tea. nice. she likes my computer. stayed up and checked her email and stuff. i was exhausted(mental drain) woke up early and went up to virgin ms.then…

last night, although exhausted beyond beyond, i had the nicest dinner w/ ss. she and s broke up and it seems like a really good thing. it was just one of those relationships that i thought(judgmental me) was ‘off’. they were both awesome. but he is so much older and she didn’t see how great…

my life is getting so weird. i went to the lc this am, had breakfast w/michelle and her ‘gang’ of friends. as i sat in the cabin , i thught abut being where i am . this place in my head . it’s definetly a differentt state of mind than any i have known. meaning…

hil is back. yeah! can’t figure out what is wrong with me..perhaps lack of food coupled with isolation is dragging my system down. whatever. i’m feeling a bit inspired to make something of this site, now. i wonder what it is i am here to do, on this earth, i mean. feel as though if…

good thing i can’t entertain myself and i’m practically thirty. it’s sunday. international day of depression. why? it ‘s the intrinsic sense of impending drudgery from 13school years of monday mornings. what else.? i wonder if ishould go to the ‘party’ at les duex tom. eve. i went last week, but i was feeling incredibly…

how annoying. i can’t find a single thing to do. i’ve surfed and surfed and all i’ve ended up with is more wants.. ie:digital camera that works. and books and cd’s.good thing it is my birthday in 39 days.

i am insane alittle right now. i know this because i am immobilized in front of the macheen and can’t decide what to eat/do/write next. hmmmmm.not such an interesting connundrum, i know. but a connundrum nonetheless. i get so much satisfaction knowing i can do anything i like.yeah

i’ve been inside almost all day and it is soo super sunny out . and i don’t care. i am not bummed that i didn’t go outside. i have a little monitor burn ,but nothing serious. got to figure out what to do with my time this eve.i need a project of some sort. perhaps…