just being peacefully high
n came over again.gave me more money.more ideas for the site. i told him he has to buy a dig. camera.so i agreed to go with him on saturday to samy’s. listeneing to marcy playground. wonder what happened to these guys. they remind me of using. actually good recall. makes me want to get high. […]
3475740
went to remedy tonight at the whisky. good turn out for them. had dinner after at swingers w/mi. felt weird at the show. hil and z were there among others. hugged z, but felt so uncomfortable watching her . ughhh. when will this end???i can’t stand being in this place of feeling ostracized. maybe it’s […]
3472516
hmmm what am i doing?mom lft today and i feel a little bummed(go figure) i am still in my state of letting every preconceived notion about myself/life gooooo it’s hard, cause i get caught in the sadness of what i think i want(ie;living here..) and how much home depresses me. ahh well. i shall try […]
the right “thinking”
so i did the right “thinking” thing. i “manifested “good feelings etc. -what it feels like to be happy joyuos &abundant. i also realized that i am not on my right path.It is obivious because everything is so hard, i am scared shitless, but i am ready tp let go of everything i know or […]
a lil structure, perhaps?
so iam going to start having themes for my writing each day. or each week. i guess . noone else reads this, so it wil be about my experiments with myself and my life and my faith in myself.starting tonight:creating what i want…ie:manifesting.okay so, i’m going to do these affirmations .i am going to meditate […]
feeling
feeling much anxiety;like i do not know my place in the world and it scares me to no end. i wonder f it is the time of month coupled with my mom with everything else that is going down. i am going to be thirty in one month., that doesn’t freak me out. what freaks […]
backsliding
this a.m. , i went to the lc, met s(new friend) there. he is very sweet. went to urth. feel less depressed. yesterday the hopeless factor was so high,it scared me. i felt like i was backsliding..into that pit i was in all winter. i still have some anger residing in me, but i ‘m […]
bff’s no-more
old bf that hated me just emailed me back and was very kind and very honest about how much i had hurt her an dhow great, origanilly, our friendship had been. wow. AND..****and i talked about my financial sit. (or lack there of)-fearful, rightly so, i guess. because once again i am in need of […]
of course , now
of course , now , as i am supposed to be on my way out..i am divinely inspired to do all this stuff to my site.whatevah
btw-my old bff
btw-my old bf that emailed me the other day..i emailed her back and she hasn’t returned my email…hmmm she’s probably not online or something-has to go to her parents to use the computer, perhaps. maybe i’ll meet someone tonight at j’s. right.. i never do.cute player boy is not going to be there…so i don’t […]
mom is here.
mom is here. she is sitting in the lving room ‘quilting’. we stayed in last night and ordered chinois.then later we walked up to stircrazy and got peppermint tea. nice. she likes my computer. stayed up and checked her email and stuff. i was exhausted(mental drain) woke up early and went up to virgin ms.then […]
no link action
none of my links work..whoops. except the email one.ahhwell. something to do