hawaii- now vegas
hawaii to be cont. when i am settled. didn’t sleep the first night home- or the next day-went to rodeo saw cute boy. dinner for cr’s bday at musso and franks…bw dk ns mjls hh etc. then went to sleep fina-fuckin’-lly then slept all am then to larchmont then everyone left for vegas for the […]
went to hospital
am went to hospital -then out w/ n for lunch-then slept alll day. thought it was next day when i awoke- went to ns’s then to dinner and dancing at ll w/ jg re ah sss etc. ab met us there- he was unsually tired this eve-so it seemed. i feel so serene and ok. […]
brother is here.
brother is here. have yet to see him. spent the a.m. with brent at the hospital. i don’t know why i feel so okay with being there. i am not scared of that enviroment- i am scared of boredom and what that does to me,essentially.how do i get to a place of prespective. purpose and […]
sometimes i am so perplexed by my life
sometimes i am so perplexed by my life and where i fit in it. i know who is important to me and i know where my intentions lie…(good, mostly) i just get a feeling sometimes that i am living someone elses life and i got here by mistake and ‘they'(the big collective ‘they’..)are going to […]
fall 2001-post tool
it’s friday and i slept almost all day..got home around 2 am, the show last night was amazing. went with ie and hil mj ag ra lel etc. all of la was there-our whole section was “comp ” seating-mjk made some funny refrences to the hollywood vermon. saw et , finally met her friend robin, […]
euro trasho centralo
nico’s bady this eve at le dome…euro trasho centralo…but i must say nico had quite the crew show uo for him- it was nice- bw and the boys dropped by later- ie and sl and hil and ad and rs and jg and ah etc were all there. actually, ad and rs came outr last […]
so much fun stuff
so much fun stuff coming up- janes addiction, nico bady-lou’s bday-tool-hawaii…oh my goodness, i am excited. this eve i have to go to a burberry store party w/ jg..but it will be over early -then dinner w/ah and hil(?) and then dancing!! yeah.
i am so sad and angry i don’t know when this is go…
i am so sad and angry i don’t know when this is going to stop i want to smoke more than i’ve ever wanted to do anyfuckingthing in my life. i’m so gaddamned irratating.(oops freudian slip?meant to say irratated..) i am supposed to be at ap’s grammy party, then to karaoke. whatever..i’m still in my […]
nics to fix
went to ns’s helped him set up computer. he is having a hard time …he and k broke up on sunday and he is struggling to work through it. i admire him very much. he is trying to do the right thing for himself and ‘grrow’ for lack of a better term… it’s awesome to […]
not having a tv is good
not having a tv is good- i was at ie’s all day yesterday glued to it. today feels more comfortable(my thinking, that is..)i am less scattered and more “in my body’ -if you will.. i guess the events of yesterday ,the HOROR of what happened, has sunk in somewhat- what i am really aware of […]
seems so pious
seems so pious to think about filling in the details of my life over the last few days- today seems like a dream- the first call i got was from ie at 6;50am then i went to the lc and it was weird. eerie and grey…which in and of itself isn’t wierd,because the weather has […]
going out, doin stuff
looking forward to going out this eve., which is not normal (of late, anyway..);Ajp is coming over at 7:30 and we’re going up the street. then to dinner and then party(?).. if i make it that far. i am still feeling kinda weak. this illness-whatever it is- is lingering in the most annoying way.had breakfast […]